something wicked this way

the air has changed and i can smell it. the date has been set and the waiting has been going on for a very long time. the anticipation is the foreplay and the meeting up will be the climax. the unknown is what tantalizes me and what i do know arouses me.

i had the shittiest of mondays today. i am not one to complain too much but this was utter shit.

when dusk hit i stripped the two pieces of clothing i had on. my new working from home uniform may be just panties or panties and a “leave nothing to the imagination” tank top. the shower ran as i gathered towels. i scrubbed and washed away this day, leaving it swirling down the drain.

my mind was already set on porn and masturbation. i was hoping someone would entertain my hearing senses and vivid imagination but alas i was left to my own vices. when i watch porn it has to be it has to be real. i don’t need much since my mind gets over stimulated so very easily. i watch and watch. i lay there in the dark with my legs slightly spread and pushing against my panties. i can feel the wetness pooling as i watch more and more. i wait and wait. i don’t touch myself at all as i watch and occasionally i will squirm, wet my lips or bite my lower lip.

what i watch is what i want. what do i want? lately it’s cock buried deep inside of me. it’s feeling a man cum inside of me, him fingering me with his cum till i come violently. it’s being beneath him as he overpowers me and takes me. it’s melting into lust and letting him have his way with me. i am easy.

writing about it quickens my breath. thinking about it makes me tense my thighs. closing my eyes displays this scene of viral lust with the violence of scratching, biting and grabbing. i want to bite into his shoulder as he fucks me. i want to dig my nails into his back as he cums inside of me. i want him to know it was real and see the proof when he stares into the mirror.

i want it all and i want more.

yes, there is something in the air.

multiple

i can tell when i haven’t been writing like i should be when i log into my wordpress account to find the dashboard has completely changed on me. i guess life does not stand still when i am not moving *wink* (sarcasm placed here).

all though frequent sex has not been squeezed into my now intense work schedule. i have managed to get myself into trouble by having frequent amounts of phone sex throughout my down time. during  my last call he experienced my multiple orgasms one after another. he didn’t know what was going on and questioned why my coming sounded so strained.

“well” panting, “i just had multiple orgasms” panting, “three of them”.

i am sure as a man hearing that from a nymphomatic woman, drew the joker’s grin on his face. i can only imagine now what he will try when we join forces. our conversation went on again. i was calming down from what felt like an intense three mile run. he kept talking to me. we have had so many conversations and i am pretty sure he continued with the the bit i am fixated on, his cum inside of me. he wanted to finger fuck me with our come and use it as lube to get me off. the thought, the talk, the vivid images in my mind caused another set of multiple orgasms with two and i was squeaking in a much higher pitch. these talks make the waiting that much more difficult.

it’s funny. when i am a predator i have all the patience in the world. i am waiting way before my prey even knows i am waiting for them. however, in this case i am impatient and need to fuck now. it’s unbearable but i know in the end worth the frustration.

on the mend

the ending of last year and beginning of this year has been plagued with “business” and doctor visits. needless to say it kept my mind not so saturated with filth. i am happy to say the “denial” phase i went through indeed proved to be efficient as i do not have anything to worry about per se.

i realize i am probably talking very vaguely and i do intend to do so.

with all the riff in my dark and deviant little world it has proved to be very sexless and almost null of orgasms. i feared it was a loss of “drive” and finally this peak i hit nearing thirty has finally headed towards the downslope. perhaps i am in denial about my peak, not being so peak.

i had a surgery on the 21st of last month that was supposed to be “out of the office for one day” and now *counting the days* it has been almost three weeks and i am still out of the office. i won’t go into details and i am fine for the most part. i had to mention the surgery because of the lack of orgasms.

painstakingly slowly i am healing. the nature of my surgery and complication impeded upon my ability to masturbate or even have sex. however, tonight i had this urge, this determination to get off. i sought out a new toy sent to me right before my surgery. it was the hitachi vibrator type of device. while watching porn and letting my mind run wild, on the lowest setting i carefully pushed it between my legs and pressed. one hand went to coach my strained muscle as i felt myself climbing in seconds. my legs tensed, my abs tensed and cautiously i came panting.

i pulled the vibrator from between my legs and caught my breath. i felt such a needed release and needed to do it again. again, i pushed the vibrating bulb againt my clit and let it hum relentlessly. the second orgasm came faster than the first and i grunted through the wave while clutching my wound in the hopes it would not knot up.

i thought the second orgasm would be the end as i shut the vibrator off again. yet, the dread of an even number made me ache for a third. i laid there thinking about how ridiculous this scene would have been. a convalescing deviant trying to get off AND trying for an odd number of orgasms due to some strange compulsion for odd numbers. i almost laughed at myself. instead, i smirked and turned the vibrator on a last time to get off. the third orgasm was very light as if my body was trying to save me from knotting up my muscle.

in my weeks of healing i finally felt sated. i felt lighter instead of heavy with pain and immobility. there is a light to this tunnel and i hope at the end it will lead me straight for the darkness where i operate at my norm. i cannot wait to be 100% again. i miss running, fucking, masturbating, hot baths, stretching and being flexible. i hope that day comes so very soon.

so this is where i stand or lay.

on a interesting note i have been contacted to have parts of my blog published in a book with other compilations. i hope this venture will be a stepping stone to perhaps a dedicated book written by me. we shall see. more details will follow as i get them. i just signed the ok for the publisher to use my posts.

it is funny because i never found myself to be a grammar worthy writer, i am very hard on myself when it comes to writing and why i have such painful lulls. so, i always have a sense of shock when someone “likes” my writing.

it’s hard to not sound like a broken record on a sex blog, especially after two full years.

i can’t can this, not yet. like i have said, i feel something in the air. perhaps it is spring and with spring there is always new beginnings.

i will leave it at that.

Thank you Always Aroused Girl for Fleshbotting this post.

that “something”

yes i have been out of commission to the point that i am sure i have lost readers, etc. but it was never about that right? i write for me. at least that is what we all say in the beginning.

i have gone through some phases and perhaps one day i can share them. i would think they would be boring for a sex blog. i haven’t even been reading blogs like i used to. i wonder if i have just out grown this. perhaps reading other’s words spurs deeper emotions inside of me that are to some degree haunting.

i created a Tumblr blog (http://darkgracie.tumblr.com/) because it is simple and i can just write and post quotes. for some reason i hold THIS blog on a pedestal. i don’t want to corrupt it, ruin it and taint it with my nonsense.

i am trying to find the inspiration, the will to write.

V is still around and very dear to me.

Shyla is still here and i love her immensely.

the both of them have weathered storms with me as of lately.

E is of course here and will never go anywhere. he is the foundation to my existence. without him i would not be alive and i am not being dramatic. i am not sure if i have written this on here but E is Love and Life to me.

my mind is still in a filthy realm and i just wish my body would cooperate.

i can’t say this is over yet. i am just waiting for that bit of “oh” from the right source. i know it will come soon. i can almost feel it. it is nearing me. i must have been  overly blessed in the past.

i just need that “something”.

clash

it started to become a challenge as he spoke assertively in my ear. he would ask me questions over and over till i gave an answer. my breathing slurred my words making me sound drunk. i wanted to come with him, he was not ready yet and i was humming. he needed the details and see in his mind our physical interactions.

“grace…grace,” he would say sternly. he knew just by my breathing if i was getting to close to explode. yet, his tone just made me more overwhelmed with this desire to hear his voice, words and every syllable that expelled from between his lips.

“ok…ok,” would whimper as i would stop touching myself to pull back from spilling over the edge. my nails would dig into my thigh as he continued to flow melodically into my mind.

i kept my eyes closed so i could see him, us. he knew me inside and out. he knew what to say and when to say it at the precise time. he knew the trigger words and sounds. by now, i was his instrument that he played effortlessly.

i tried to control myself as my chest heaved. my heart pounded and my nails dug deeper into my flesh. the sting did not register because his voice paralyzed me. slowly i would calm down and speak so softly and innocently to him. there was desperation in my voice and he knew. it was a slow torment to force myself not to come without him. it was an ultimate joy to share intense orgasms together. the sounds, the sensuality, the connection and that was the true pleasure.

at times i would get this brief moment of clarity and focus. i would ask him if i could suck on his carotid artery on the left side of his neck or bite down on his left shoulder or dig my nails into the smooth skin of his back or grip his hardness with my hand. i asked him if i could stroke him with my black panties till he came and pushed the cum drenched fabric inside of me. at that visual that was drawn so vividly in our minds we had to, we had to come.

once he came with me, it would soon become almost chaotic as he would tell me to come with him again and again. i would be hoarse, breathless and exhausted. it was never enough, never. i felt he was breaking me, pushing me, seeing how far i could go and there were times i had to stop.

in the past i have always tried to have as many orgasms as i could. but this, this was a task to actually control myself. me control myself in the heat the moment with him? that constitutes a true contradiction.

Thank you Jefferson for Fleshbotting this post.

sing to me

i love when a voice speaks with precise rhythm.

the pronunciation of each word.

the various tones.

it is a seductive song to me.